Fics I'd Never Write

Title: Fics I'd Never Write
Characters: Any and all FMA characters
Rating: NC-17
Warning: Not work or brain safe. Bizarre pairings and even more bizarre actions.

This is an ongoing game based on this meme:
Name three fics you think I will never, ever, ever write. In return, I will attempt to write a snippet of one of them.

It's basically turned into:
Give me a bizarre FMA prompt that I would never, ever, ever write, and I will write it into a short fic for you.

Feel free, after you've been scarred by the requests so far, to leave me another one to write. I'll be glad to do it. :) Try and scar me, come on! I dare you!

( Gluttony/Envy - 'Best Served Hot' )

( Archer/Havoc - 'Private Threats' )

( Roy/Havoc - 'Accident' )

( Barry the Chopper/Gluttony - 'Christmas Ham' )

( Elricest - 'I Can Feel You' )

( Izumi/Edward - 'Lesson Plan' )

( Sieg/Armstrong - 'Sculpted Perfection' )

( Chimera!Tucker/Martel/Greed - 'A Clear Head' )

( Black Hayate/Charlie the Dog - 'Loyalty of the Highest Caliber' )

( Armstrong/Mustang - 'Choke' )

( Pride!Ed/Fem!Ed - 'Mirror, Mirror' )

( Greed/Ed - 'Sweet' )

( Pinako/Armstrong - 'An Old Lady's Musings' )

( Wrath/Al - Affection' )

( Yoki/Lyra - Mental Imagery' )

( Ed + Sieg/Armstrong/Envy/Gluttony - The Wrong Bowl' )

( Ed/Dragon!Envy - 'Nowhere to Run' )

( Father + Lust/Greed/Envy/Sloth/Wrath/Pride/Gluttony - 'Perfect Sin' )

( Alphons Heiderich/Wrath - 'Picking Up Strays' )

Keep 'em coming, guys. This meme never expires. :)